-san, -kun, -chan?

[mayucat]

<!--QuoteBegin-SWC+Oct 29 2004, 11:16 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%'

cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (SWC @ Oct 29 2004, 11:16 AM)</td></tr><tr><td

id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> -chan is normally used for girls younger than you.

-kun is normally used

for boys your age or younger, however my friend's wife (who is younger than him) always refers to him as

Joe-kun.

-san should be used if you are referring to an older person...or someone you want to show

respect to and/or you don't know their age. (Just to be safe...if you don't know...I would use

"san"). [/quote]
This is

definitly true for people you don't know well, but with friends you can play around a bit.
An

ex-boyfriend used to call me "Ota-kun" cuz he thought it funny I guess, and I often call my much

older, male friends "Ko-chan" or "Toku-chan" affectionately.
Of course, it totally

depends on the situation. If a friend calls me Mayuko-san instead of Mayu-chan, it feels cold and formal, but

if someone I don't know well calls me mayu-chan in a formal situation, it can seem condescending. Also, it

can actually be flattering to call an older woman -chan in really casual settings.

Perhaps I've

complicated the question unneccesarily. I think it's best just to see what everyone else calls the person

and follow along.

Kadoya-san, would you really want your colleagues to call you "danyaru?"

That would be kind of rude I would imagine.